Comments on: Assertiveness Training http://www.simpleandloveable.com/assertiveness-training How to make Simple and Loveable businesses Wed, 01 Feb 2012 20:19:30 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1 By: Josh http://www.simpleandloveable.com/assertiveness-training/comment-page-1#comment-7550 Josh Fri, 05 Mar 2010 08:44:15 +0000 http://www.simpleandloveable.com/?p=979#comment-7550 Yes there are those people but the fact remains the other person's paradigm may also be valid. I think it's about having the respect for the other person's point of view and giving them opportunity to express it. But there is also respect for yourself and having the courage to be unambiguous and candid in your response. Having empathy for the other person is a function of the quality of the relationship and trust present... neither of which you have in spades with the one-off clients so you could pre-filter or do some research as part of the initial client assessment? How could you ask questions that would red-flag bad intent? oh now I'm just rambling... Yes there are those people but the fact remains the other person’s paradigm may also be valid.

I think it’s about having the respect for the other person’s point of view and giving them opportunity to express it. But there is also respect for yourself and having the courage to be unambiguous and candid in your response. Having empathy for the other person is a function of the quality of the relationship and trust present… neither of which you have in spades with the one-off clients so you could pre-filter or do some research as part of the initial client assessment? How could you ask questions that would red-flag bad intent?

oh now I’m just rambling…

]]> By: Nat http://www.simpleandloveable.com/assertiveness-training/comment-page-1#comment-7548 Nat Fri, 05 Mar 2010 01:45:38 +0000 http://www.simpleandloveable.com/?p=979#comment-7548 Yes! One of the key things I do is write really angry rant email replies, then save them, go home and come back the next day... Delete 99% of the email, remove the ranting elements and send through the key points. But you know how there are some people who seem to exert authority and confidence that they are 100% right. I wish I could do that when I AM right!!! Yes! One of the key things I do is write really angry rant email replies, then save them, go home and come back the next day… Delete 99% of the email, remove the ranting elements and send through the key points.

But you know how there are some people who seem to exert authority and confidence that they are 100% right. I wish I could do that when I AM right!!!

]]> By: Josh http://www.simpleandloveable.com/assertiveness-training/comment-page-1#comment-7543 Josh Wed, 03 Mar 2010 14:01:53 +0000 http://www.simpleandloveable.com/?p=979#comment-7543 Well as someone who works for a large bank dealing with lack of trust/consequences of this in terms of getting things done, it seems difficult to give advice. I wax and wane between being a sociopathic cynic about the possibility of delegating and disengaging from the issue. Maybe you need to vent to someone/some punch bag for 10 minutes, a trainer taught me pretty well 'cut the drama', focus on the issues which are real and clear. I recently had a big moan about a course I was doing. Sent it to one person, and then had the perspective to do constructive things about it. Not implying that there are constructive avenues to resolving your situation but having the emotional strength to draw a line under unpleasant experiences is very valuable. While being easy to say and hard to do! Well as someone who works for a large bank dealing with lack of trust/consequences of this in terms of getting things done, it seems difficult to give advice. I wax and wane between being a sociopathic cynic about the possibility of delegating and disengaging from the issue.
Maybe you need to vent to someone/some punch bag for 10 minutes, a trainer taught me pretty well ‘cut the drama’, focus on the issues which are real and clear. I recently had a big moan about a course I was doing. Sent it to one person, and then had the perspective to do constructive things about it.

Not implying that there are constructive avenues to resolving your situation but having the emotional strength to draw a line under unpleasant experiences is very valuable. While being easy to say and hard to do!

]]> By: Richallum http://www.simpleandloveable.com/assertiveness-training/comment-page-1#comment-7542 Richallum Wed, 03 Mar 2010 06:02:39 +0000 http://www.simpleandloveable.com/?p=979#comment-7542 It can be as simle as taking that deep breath and doing all that you say. The trick is remembering and being confident about the fact that you are good at what you do and are right and reasonable about the points you are putting accross. Confidence will come over as assertive with many people. There are bad peole out there who will take advantage no mater how confident or assertive you are, especially if they are in a different country. You've had the misfortune to find two if them! You are good at what you do, operate in a professional way and that brings respect from reasonable people, don't change too much! It can be as simle as taking that deep breath and doing all that you say. The trick is remembering and being confident about the fact that you are good at what you do and are right and reasonable about the points you are putting accross. Confidence will come over as assertive with many people. There are bad peole out there who will take advantage no mater how confident or assertive you are, especially if they are in a different country. You’ve had the misfortune to find two if them! You are good at what you do, operate in a professional way and that brings respect from reasonable people, don’t change too much!

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